Going all out: Is it worth it?

I now know what I need to be well.  Of course it includes medication and keeping my doctor’s appointments.  It means trying to keep a regular bedtime and to exercise as much as I can without being obsessive.  It means shopping is a sign of trouble.  But most of all, my Achilles’ heel, is diet.

For eight days I kept it up.  Strictly no sweeteners of any kind, including honey or any sort of “diet” drink.  Nothing fried and no fast food.  No bread or wheat products.  In fact, no processed foods at all.  Low dairy.  Lots of water, lemon or lime okay.  As always, no alcohol.  Obviously no baked goods or doughnuts.

Then we went to dinner at a friend’s house.  She made all sort of forbidden foods.  I ate them all because I did not want to offend and wanted to enjoy all she prepared for us.

Things went downhill from there.

So, I’m at a place where I must make a choice.  Am I going to do this half-heartedly?  If so, why do it at all?  It only “works” with an absolute commitment.  Half way might has well be no-way.  I’ve got to drop everything, deny my desires and forget about how wonderful a chocolate cupcake with butter cream frosting really is.  If I don’t, I will be treating myself and my family to bipolar cycling.  Some where, Mr. M says, I need a sign saying all of this.  I haven’t done it yet and I forget how important this is to me and the rest of the brood.  I’m starting on this tonight.


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