I’m wanting to avoid telling myself a sad story about my career, but I’ve got to do it.
I spent a long time finding the job for me. I made videos for an ESL company. I corrected standardized tests. I wrote for various websites. Most frequently I worked as a behavior therapist.
I thought things were good at the behavior therapist’s job until the family I worked with decided they didn’t want me. I have yet to receive a new client. I consider myself fired. I applied for a Christian lifestyle website staff writer job, a position I just found out I didn’t get.
That is what set me over the edge to these tears. I had been telling myself I didn’t care, and I thought I didn’t. Same thing about my weight – I thought I didn’t care about that. (I was 200+ lbs in December, although I am losing now.)
Turns out I might. When I first started my behavior therapist job dh and I thought it was perfect. I walked Small to school and got there in time to pick her up. I was good at the work (I thought I was anyway) and I got to speak Spanish, something I love.
But I keep losing, or not getting job after job and we need this to get out of debt. I need not to take this personally, but I really am and I am crying right now in my empty house.